Lebron and Anthony davis Restructure deals for veteran minimums; sign $30 million space jam 2 salaries

The NBA was rocked last Saturday when the Lakers traded for NBA superstar Anthony Davis. However, that excitement was soon calmed when it was revealed that due to timing the Lakers would only have $23 million in Cap room with only 3 players currently signed. Then out of sheer selflessness and desire to win Lebron James and Anthony Davis restructured their contracts to sign for veteran minimums and free up $83 million in cap space. Absolutely Amazing.

In an unrelated story LeBron and Anthony Davis recently sign $30 Million dollar deals to star in Space Jam 2. In what can only be describe as instant good karma, the Gods were clearly blessing these two men for their dedication to winning.

The two highest paid actor in Hollywood.

In yet another Unrelated story, the Lakers have donated $60 million dollars to the making of Space Jam 2. This marks a new era in Hollywood as a major sports team has never been the primary funder of a major motion picture. The fact that the Lakers care so much to support LeBron’s acting career is clearly simply a reward for him cutting almost all of his salary from their salary cap.

“Are you guys dumb” said James Dolan, owner of the Knicks and man who gave Carmelo Anthony a max contract. “Clearly they agreed to waive their salaries with the promise of paying them the money through the Space Jam 2 facade. This is some sort of Sports Money Laundering we have never seen before, and it needs to be stopped.” Dolan went on to make some other points but his clear bias convinced us not to publish any of it. At one point we believe Dolan referred to this issue as Space-Jam-Two-Gate (he clearly spent Zero time on that name).

Rich Paul, LeBron’s agent and straight shooter

We tried to reach the agent of LeBron and AD, Rich Paul, for comment but were unable to gain access into the conference room he was in. However, we did overhear Mr. Paul laughing and proclaiming loudly ” Hahah, I get my 10% either way. We beat the system, baby!”. Clearly a proud agent who was simply happy for his clients following their passions into Hollywood followed by a throwaway comment about some sort of system.

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Update: We have just learned that 5 minutes after this story broke, in yet another related story, ESPN personality Skip Bayless suffered a heart attack and was rushed to Brentwood Hospital

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